Recovery

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    The Discovering Alcoholic

  • Recovery Requires Brutal Honesty

    The Discovering Alcoholic
    6 Nov 2009 | 7:31 pm
    What a cool commercial, sort of Southern trailer park avant garde… now that’s truth in advertising! Initially catching my attention because I pass through Cullman often in my travels, this clip seemed like a good way to highlight the importance of honesty, particularly with oneself, in recovery. According toStephen King addiction is the liar’s disease, “substance abusers lie about everything, and usually do an awesome job of it.” He says about the only way to overcome the affliction is to practice complete honesty, but that this usually requires the occasional audience of our peers…

  • Why All Does Not Seem Better When Your Loved One Stops Drinking

    The Discovering Alcoholic
    5 Nov 2009 | 5:04 pm
    Thank you author and speaker Lisa Frederiksen of Breaking the Cycles for this regular series sharing her decades long experience of dealing with family alcoholism and alcohol abuse. Click here to see the rest of the series. Time and again readers and those I speak with express their concerns that ‘things’ don’t feel better once the drinking stops. They worry that ‘this is it!’? Often this makes them fearful of their loved one’s recovery or question whether their loved one is really in recovery. This is when it helps to recall the neural networks in a…

  • Vodka Avalanche Buries Drunk Forklift Driver

    The Discovering Alcoholic
    4 Nov 2009 | 9:00 am
    A fitting video for a nation that is being crushed by rampant alcoholism, the clip is of a drunk Russian forklift driver that brings down an avalanche of vodka and cognac. The inebriated version of Murphy’s Law, the Luck of the Drunk, was in effect and fortunately no one was seriously injured in the accident. I had intended to relate this accident to Russia’s current public health campaign against alcohol abuse, but it seems the NY Times News Blog has preempted me with Tackling the Russian God. You can however click here to read more of TDA on Russia.

  • You Some Think Handcuffs Are Going to Stop This?

    The Discovering Alcoholic
    3 Nov 2009 | 9:36 pm
    Stacy Goodwin is the Ohio mother shown in the video attacking Lori Osterland who was in court to face charges that she was complicit in the death of Goodwin’s daughter, 20 year-old Carri Goodwin. Alliance, Ohio, police say the Goodwin sisters and Osterland were out drinking. They believe 20-year-old Carri passed out in a car on a cold night and nobody checked her… Carrie died of acute alcohol poisoning and hypothermia. ~ MyFoxDC “You some think handcuffs are going to stop this?” Is what Goodwin yelled as she was restrained and led out of the courtroom. Actually the handcuffs did seem…

  • The Oprah Winfrey Show – [BEYOND] The Diane Schuler Story

    The Discovering Alcoholic
    2 Nov 2009 | 3:06 pm
    Thank you author and speaker Lisa Frederiksen of Breaking the Cycles for this regular series sharing her decades long experience of dealing with family alcoholism and alcohol abuse. Click here to see the rest of the series. I watched the titled Oprah show, yesterday (10/27/09), and was struck on so many, many fronts, but the two I’m going to talk about in this post have nothing to do with the Diane Schuler Story. They relate to the portions of the show that followed that segment. 1. The first segment, “A Mother’s Fatal Decision,” I want to address starts around minute…
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    Addiction and Recovery News

  • Stigma and community

    Jason Schwartz
    6 Nov 2009 | 6:17 am
    I read this Ta-Nehisi Coates post yesterday on domestic violence, responsibility, individual agency, community, shame, isolation and empowerment. It's really stuck with me. Very heavy, heady stuff in a very short post.It got me thinking about some of the mechanisms of addiction and stigma, and the healing mechanisms of the recovering community. He points out the empowering aspects of a community of oppressed people and the responsibility this community confers upon its members.Further along these lines, Bill White has a new paper on stigma, addiction and methadone. It poses some interesting…

  • Almost impossible to ignore

    Jason Schwartz
    4 Nov 2009 | 5:57 am
    An interesting explanation of dopamine's function--distinguishing drive and motivation from pleasure and reward:In the emerging view, discussed in part at the Society for Neuroscience meeting last week in Chicago, dopamine is less about pleasure and reward than about drive and motivation, about figuring out what you have to do to survive and then doing it. “When you can’t breathe, and you’re gasping for air, would you call that pleasurable?” said Nora D. Volkow, a dopamine researcher and director of the National Institute on Drug Abuse. “Or when you’re so hungry that you eat…

  • Lozenge/Patch Combo Best for Kicking Butts

    Jason Schwartz
    3 Nov 2009 | 12:02 pm
    Encouraging findings for people trying to quit smoking:Smokers are more than twice as likely to quit if they use the nicotine patch along with nicotine lozenges—compared to lozenges or patches alone, buproprion (Xyban), buproprion plus the lozenges or placebo.  The trial was the largest study ever to compare these approaches head to head, and included 1,504 smokers.All of the treatment groups did better than placebo—but the effect was strongest for the patch/lozenge combination, 40% of whom successfully kicked the habit.  Smokers using this combo were not only more likely to quit, but…

  • Gemini and Granny Growers

    Jason Schwartz
    3 Nov 2009 | 11:23 am
    A mini pot tab dump:Baby Boomers and retirees are plunging into the medical marijuanabusinessA short history of Gemini Dream

  • Recovery pandemic

    Jason Schwartz
    3 Nov 2009 | 11:18 am
    holy cow, it’s happening to you too.Androcles writes a nice post on the infectious nature of recovery and hope.
 
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    Addiction Recovery Blog

  • Addiction Recovery Newsletter (11/2/2009)

    Editor
    2 Nov 2009 | 8:48 am
    Dear RecoveryHelper.org Readers, Welcome to the Addiction Recovery Newsletter (11/2/2009). In this edition we have included news, articles and videos. You can find more resources on our website: RecoveryHelper.org. Addiction Recovery News Federal Government Pushes Development of Addiction Vaccines The federal government wants to leverage interest and investment in vaccine development to get pharmaceutical companies to develop drugs that could “inoculate” people against addiction to cocaine, nicotine, and other substances. (More) Speed-Accuracy Tradeoff in Decision-Making…

  • Addiction Recovery Newsletter (10/26/2009)

    Editor
    26 Oct 2009 | 12:24 am
    Dear RecoveryHelper.org Readers, Welcome to the Addiction Recovery Newsletter (10/26/2009). In this edition we have included news, articles and videos. You can find more resources on our website: RecoveryHelper.org. Addiction Recovery News Reduced attentional blink for alcohol-related stimuli in heavy social drinkers. - Tibboel H, De Houwer J, Field M. Researchers have used various paradigms to show that attentional biases for substance-related stimuli are an important feature of addictive behaviours. However, it is not clear whether these attentional biases occur at the level of encoding or…

  • Addiction Recovery Newsletter (10/20/2009)

    Editor
    20 Oct 2009 | 3:43 am
    Dear RecoveryHelper.org Readers, Welcome to the Addiction Recovery Newsletter (10/20/2009). In this edition we have included news, articles and videos. You can find more resources on our website: RecoveryHelper.org. Addiction Recovery News New Understanding Of Why Seizures Occur With Alcohol Withdrawal Epileptic seizures are the most dramatic and prominent aspect of the “alcohol withdrawal syndrome” that occurs when a person abruptly stops a long-term or chronic drinking habit. Researchers have shown that the flow of calcium ions into brain cells via voltage-gated calcium channels…

  • Addiction Recovery Newsletter (10/13/2009)

    Editor
    13 Oct 2009 | 7:02 am
    Dear RecoveryHelper.org Readers, Welcome to the Addiction Recovery Newsletter (10/13/2009). In this edition we have included news, articles and videos. You can find more resources on our website: RecoveryHelper.org. Addiction Recovery News Polymorphisms Of The Interleukin-1 Gene Complex May Influence Alcohol Dependence Cytokines are small proteins secreted by cells that serve as molecular messengers between cells. Pro-inflammatory cytokines — which function in the immune system — may be involved in alcohol dependence. A study of three polymorphisms of the interleukin-1 gene…

  • Addiction Recovery Newsletter (10/7/2009)

    Editor
    7 Oct 2009 | 10:36 am
    Dear RecoveryHelper.org Readers, Welcome to the Addiction Recovery Newsletter (10/7/2009). In this edition we have included news, articles and videos. You can find more resources on our website: RecoveryHelper.org. Addiction Recovery News Fighting cocaine addiction with vaccine-like shots shows promise in government-funded research Local experts who treat those with addiction says a Cocaine vaccine study that was able to keep some abusers from getting high, shows a lot of promise. Researchers injected the addicts repeatedly over several weeks with the vaccine, and in about 40% of……
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    Addiction Recovery Basics

  • How To Change Negative Thinking In Addiction Recovery

    Bill Urell
    4 Nov 2009 | 7:10 pm
    What we think about a situation or event will determine feeling and emotions and later, behaviors and actions. In early addiction recovery, our thoughts are often not in line with what 98% of the world would think about the same event that we are thinking about. Someone is looking at me, I think they are challenging me, I feel disrespected and I say what the heck are you looking at, and I am ready to fight. Let’s challenge that thought. Ok someone is looking at me, maybe he likes my shirt and is wondering where I got it, if that is the case I certainly don’t want to fight the guy.

  • Locating Local Addiction Treatment Centers

    Bill Urell
    3 Nov 2009 | 6:29 pm
    A question that I am very frequently asked is how go about locating local  addiction treatment help. In all honesty, I would not trust an Internet search because there is a lot of bad information and huge advertising budgets out there. The one solid recommendation I make is to use the addiction treatment locator provided by the Substance Abuse and Mental Health Services Administration which is a division of the US Department of Health and Human Services. If the treatment center is licensed, or certified it will be listed here. You simply click on the map; enter a radius from your zip code…

  • A Tale Only Addicts In Recovery Will Understand

    Bill Urell
    30 Oct 2009 | 8:41 pm
    In speaking with other addicts in recovery… I was made acutely aware of something as I was trying to get across to my father what it was like to be an alcoholic. He is not. Normal people just don’t get it. It’s not their fault, they just really can’t. I used this as an example. I said suppose you went out on your birthday and got very very drunk, ended up tipping over the table in the restaurant, banging into walls and falling down. On the way home you nearly wrecked the car, and picked a fight with your wife who should be minding her own business, as you were trying to get the key in…

  • Excuse Our Appearance

    Bill Urell
    29 Oct 2009 | 5:54 pm
    Please excuse our appearance. I am shifting to a new theme and have misplaced some fromatting and page links. We are working quickly to restore order. Bill

  • Getting Stuck Is Normal, Staying Stuck Is A Drag

    Bill Urell
    25 Oct 2009 | 6:12 pm
    Most people feel don’t feel good about themselves from time to time. In my experience though, people in active addiction and entering addiction recovery don’t feel that great about themselves a lot of the time. This is completely understandable. If we are working moving ahead on our recovery program, in all probability, we have found a certain amount of wreckage and consequences in the past and present that can generate some very unpleasant feelings. I think it is very important not stay stuck or locked into having a low opinion of ourselves. After all, isn’t our goal in…
 
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    Treatment Centers Blogs

  • TGIF Blog O'The Day

    6 Nov 2009 | 5:47 am
    Just living is not enough. One must have sunshine, freedom, and a little flower. ~Hans Christian AndersonThe Royal College of Nursing in England issued a report suggesting that alcohol use will cause over 90,000 avoidable deaths in the next decade.The Royal College of Nursing wants better regulation of the alcohol industry to lessen the dangers and health care costs associated with heavy drinking.“For 90,000 lives to be thrown away as a result of excessive drinkRead More...

  • Thursday 11-5-09 Blog O'The day

    5 Nov 2009 | 5:30 am
    The future is always beginning now. ~Mark Strand, Reasons for MovingYour genetic content may predispose you to drink more but may not increase your genetic risk for alcoholism. New research pinpoints genetic pathways and genes associated with levels of alcohol consumption but not with alcohol dependence in rats and humans.Researchers at the University of Colorado used rats to identify the genetic pathways affecting alcohol drinking behavior. They found that the rats’ drRead More...

  • Thursday 11-5-09 Blog O'The Day

    5 Nov 2009 | 5:15 am
    The future is always beginning now. ~Mark Strand, Reasons for MovingYour genetic content may predispose you to drink more but may not increase your genetic risk for alcoholism. New research pinpoints genetic pathways and genes associated with levels of alcohol consumption but not with alcohol dependence in rats and humans.Researchers at the University of Colorado used rats to identify the genetic pathways affecting alcohol drinking behavior. They found that the rats’ drRead More...

  • Wednesday 11-4-09 Blog O'The Day

    4 Nov 2009 | 7:33 am
    Unless I accept my faults I will most certainly doubt my virtues. ~Hugh PratherAlcohol consumption has long been linked to cancer and its spread, but the underlying mechanism has never been clear. Now, researchers at Rush University Medical Center in Chicago have identified a cellular pathway that may explain the link.The researchers found that alcohol stimulates what is called the epithelial-to-mesenchymal transition, in which ordinary cancer cells morph into a more aggressiRead More...

  • I just discovered my boyfriend is a crack user.

    3 Nov 2009 | 11:42 am
       I am new to this but I am looking for some guidance on this issue from an outside source. I have been dating a wonderful guy for over a year now. I had my suspicions for quite some time that something was going on. My boyfriend worked for a gentleman who often smoked crack and that's why my initial suspicions came in to place. He would ditch me for one specific friend, more often recently. He also disappeared about 6 months back for 3 days and told me afterwards thRead More...
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    Medical News Today: Alcohol, Addiction, Illegal Drugs

  • FDA Warns Consumers On Sexual Enhancement Products

    6 Nov 2009 | 4:00 am
    The U.S. Food and Drug Administration is warning consumers that Stiff Nights, a product marketed as a dietary supplement for sexual enhancement, contains an ingredient that can dangerously lower blood pressure and is illegal. Over the past several years, the FDA has found

  • Campaign Launches To Sound Alarm About The Misuse Of Prescription Drugs Among Teens

    6 Nov 2009 | 2:00 am
    The National Council on Patient Information and Education (NCPIE), along with the Substance Abuse and Mental Health Services Administration (SAMHSA) and representatives from 15 nationally recognized prevention, health professional and child advocacy organizations, are launching Maximizing Your Role as a Teen Influencer: What You Can Do to Help Prevent Teen Prescription Drug Abuse.

  • Use Of Cannabinoids (Marijuana) Could Help Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder Patients

    5 Nov 2009 | 1:00 am
    Use of cannabinoids (marijuana) could assist in the treatment of post-traumatic stress disorder patients. This is exposed in a recent study carried out at the Learning and Memory Lab in the University of Haifa's Department of Psychology. The study, carried out by research student Eti Ganon-Elazar under the supervision of Dr. Irit Akirav, was published in the prestigious Journal of Neuroscience.

  • Potential Drug Target For Alcoholism From Drunken Fruit Flies

    5 Nov 2009 | 12:00 am
    A group of drunken fruit flies have helped researchers from North Carolina State and Boston universities identify entire networks of genes - also present in humans - that play a key role in alcohol drinking behavior. This discovery, published in the October 2009 print issue of the journal Genetics, provides a crucial explanation of why some people seem to tolerate alcohol better than others, as well as a potential target for drugs aimed at preventing or eliminating alcoholism.

  • Link Between Stress-Induced Changes In Brain Circuitry And Cocaine Relapse

    2 Nov 2009 | 12:00 am
    Stress-evoked changes in circuits that regulate serotonin in certain parts of the brain can precipitate a low mood and a relapse in cocaine-seeking, based on mouse studies published online this week in the Proceedings of the National Academy of Sciences. "The impetus for this research was our interest in how stress alters the brain's cell receptors and protein signals in ways that lead to mood changes, depression, anxiety, and drug seeking," said Dr.
 
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    Drug & Alcohol Addiction Recovery

  • Do Genetics Cause Addiction?

    The role of genetics in addiction has been debated for decades. Scientists and other health experts have successfully identified various risk factors for the development of addiction, but concise and objective predictors of addiction have eluded discovery. This year, however, science has made significant strides in discerning how genetics may ...

  • Dopamine: The Key to Addiction?

    Researchers nationwide have been focusing a lot of attention on dopamine – a chemical produced by the human brain – in an effort to unlock the riddle of addiction. So far, dopamine has been linked to several fundamental physiological processes, and plays key roles in pleasure, addiction and even disease. Researchers ...

  • Alcohol Intolerance and Allergies: When Alcohol Is Toxic to the Body

    Although most people can drink a moderate amount of alcohol without suffering serious physical effects, some people’s bodies are intolerant — or, more rarely, allergic — to alcohol. The reactions that can accompany alcohol intolerance and allergy run from fairly mild to life-threatening. Individuals who have never consumed alcohol before ...

  • Plants as Recreational Drugs

    Recently, stories about young people using exotic plants to get high have been all over the news. The media attention highlights a trend that appears to span the United States. A news story out of western Nebraska reported that teens in that region were ingesting the seeds of a common ...

  • Attention Deficit Hyperactivity Disorder (ADHD) and Stimulant Medications

    At the same time that teens are bombarded with anti-drug messages, many are also given prescriptions for psychoactive medications, including those that treat Attention Deficit Hyperactivity Disorder (ADHD). Experts continue to debate whether these medications are more harmful or helpful, and whether habituating young people to taking psychoactive medication increases ...
 
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    Attitude of Gratitude

  • 11.06.09

    Scott W
    6 Nov 2009 | 5:55 am
    Frank Lloyd Wright’s masterpiece, Falling Water If you want guarantees in life, then you don’t want life. You want rehearsals for a script that’s already been written. Life by its nature cannot have guarantees, or its whole purpose is thwarted. ~Conversations with God Today I am grateful… that experience tells me that if I take the step in front of me I probably won’t trip today. If I do then I can just get right back up and take the next one. that today I do not have to play off someone’s pain or loss to gain self adulation that yesterday afternoon I and a friend totally escaped…

  • 11.05.09 part 2

    Scott W
    5 Nov 2009 | 6:33 am
    What people really need is a good listening-to. ~Mary Lou CaseyToday I am grateful…for bullet points for Live Writer which I am posting through. Thanks Piglet! This is going to change how I blog! that this is a test post for double gratitude lists (see below)that the weather is GLORIOUS! We of A.A. obey spiritual principles, at first because we must, then because we ought to, and ultimately because we love the kind of life such obedience brings. Great suffering and great love are A.A.'s disciplinarians; we need no others. -12 and 12, p. 174

  • 5 Nov 2009 | 5:39 am

    Scott W
    5 Nov 2009 | 5:39 am
    Taken with the Sepia Photo app on my iPhone.

  • 11.05.09

    Scott W
    5 Nov 2009 | 5:37 am
    I found I could say things with color and shapes that I couldn't say any other way -- things I had no words for. ~Georgia O'KeeffeToday I am grateful...that I do not have to apologize to anyone for my sobrietythat I can live in a flow of gratitudethat I have been given the grace to want to write a gratitude list dailythat every day I concentrate on turning things over and letting them go in an attempt to express my gratitude to my Higher Power. I strive for trust.that I forget that you may have the same feelings as I, that you may be hurting or you may have the same feelings of fearfor…

  • 4 Nov 2009 | 5:47 am

    Scott W
    4 Nov 2009 | 5:47 am
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    higher powered

  • knowing the difference

    dAAve
    6 Nov 2009 | 2:13 am
    todAAy i AAm grAAteful & thAAnkfulthat I'm not what I was, but I can be better than I am nowthat I have no power over the way my HP makes things happen but I do have control over how I react to those thingsthat I chose to react differently yesterday to a situation that once would have caused me to explode in a public tantrum; yesterday, I just walked away from a volatile situationfor my sponsees; they keep me grounded when I feel like flyingTo be without some of the things you want is an indispensable part of happiness.- Bertrand Russell

  • onward

    dAAve
    5 Nov 2009 | 3:06 am
    one of the winners in a sand castle competitiontodAAy i AAm grAAteful & thAAnkfulfor Step 11 improvement -- when I look at where I was 6 years ago when I stopped drinking, I am amazed at the evolution of my own spirituality. I also know that this must continue, and it will as long as I keep doing what I'm doing.for Fi. She's a most lovely woman from Dublin who occasionally visits Houston and comes to AA meetings at Lambda while here. She shared her experience yesterday with us before headin gfo rthe airport and then back home to Ireland. I hope that she and my significant other can…

  • Gifts

    dAAve
    4 Nov 2009 | 3:12 am
    I snapped this photo across the street from my house.todAAy i AAm grAAteful & thAAnkfulfor the rewards of being the best I can bethat I voted in another election, thus exercising a privilege that some don't havethat I got a new mobile phone, had trouble getting the settings right, didn't blow a gasket (my normal, old behavior)Good and evil do not befall men without reason. Heaven sends them happiness or misery according to their conduct.- Confucius

  • TUES

    dAAve
    3 Nov 2009 | 3:07 am
    The Texas way to hunttodAAy i AAm grAAteful & thAAnkfulfor the multitude of ways that being accountable keeps my behavior in check, the least of which is Step 10for some clarity of thought on a number of very minor issuesthat my November calendar is filling up with busy stuff to do -- that's kinda new for methat time changes have never had any effect on me; I don't even notice it, whether it's 1 hour or 10 hours (flying)When people talk, listen completely. Most people never listen.- Ernest Hemingway

  • I smile at such a sally

    dAAve
    2 Nov 2009 | 2:01 am
    This may be the best costume I've seen.todAAy i AAm grAAteful & thAAnkfulto see people recovering from active alcoholismthat yesterday we had a meeting about some of the paradoxes we hear in AA meetings; ie: you have to give it away to keep it. Do you have one? Let me know in the comment section.for Rule 62 (if you dont' know what that is, look it up or ask your sponsor; if your sponsor doesn't know what it is, get a new sponsor)to see all the great costumes at Lambda Center on Halloweenfor perfect weather during the weekendWe cannot hold a torch to light another person’s path without…
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    sobriety girl

  • The Seven Year Itch

    sobriety girl ©
    18 Oct 2009 | 11:32 am
    I've hit a crossroad in the last year that likens itself to the seven year itch, as referred in marriage and a Monroe film. It is during this time in a marriage, after seven years, that being unfaithful may become into thought. I can assume (I say mostly assume because my own marriage didn't come close to seven years) that there just comes a time in any committed relationship that you question just about every aspect. And seven years seems like the perfect amount of time. You've gotten to know someone, you know habits and behaviors. Your goals may change and your lives may no longer run…

  • The Demise.

    sobriety girl ©
    19 Aug 2009 | 12:56 pm
    As there are many cycles in our lives, I find one cycle within sobriety that has been resonating over and over again in the last year. Over the last few weeks, I have been dealing with my ever questioning state of sobriety with a scowl and intermittent indifference. The cycle of questions that force me to look at where I am in my life and what I truly need to be happy and content with the decisions I make. Formulate a plan. Let go of the past. Live life with gusto. Be sober. Be happy. And my addicted self, all the while, is hanging on my back like a bad relationship causing great distress.The…

  • She let go.

    sobriety girl ©
    30 Jul 2009 | 3:50 am
    "She let go. Without a thought or a word, she let go.She let go of the fear. She let go of the judgments. She let go of the confluence of opinions swarming around her head. She let go of the committee of indecision within her. She let go of all the 'right' reasons. Wholly and completely, without hesitation or worry, she just let go.She didn't ask anyone for advice. She didn't read a book on how to let go... She didn't search the scriptures. She just let go. She let go of all of the memories that held her back. She let go of all of the anxiety that kept her from moving forward. She let go of…

  • The Contentious Relationship.

    sobriety girl ©
    30 Jun 2009 | 3:13 pm
    Over the last few months, there has been a complete breakdown of communication. I've been bitter and angry. Spiteful. Hurt. I've almost walked away several times. I've battled, yelled, pleaded and tried total rationalization with little success. It's been up and down to the point that I've become dizzy. I've cried in anger and quickly retreated by begging for forgiveness. Wrote letters, painted pictures and played sappy songs trying to find some neutral ground. Indifference. Love. Indifference revisited.At this point in my life, the aforementioned is my relationship with myself as a sober…

  • Present.

    sobriety girl ©
    21 Jun 2009 | 4:35 pm
    I don't know that I have ever truly believed that people could be present within their lives. If one is present, I've thought, where does the past fit in? I have always been one to try and rectify my past by trying to figure it out. To solve the problems that happened so long ago. My methodology would be to rack my brain for months trying to understand what in my past was causing me to make poor decisions. In reality, I was trying to assign blame and dysfunction on anything but myself and these decisions that were not grounded in present thinking. And, in an even more stark reality, I've…
 
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    Woman.Anonymous7

  • Back to basics

    4 Nov 2009 | 8:24 pm
    Getting back to practices, facing outward and connecting, focusing on the present, taking care of myself - working all these things is grounding me and getting me back to a peaceful place. It's like the fog suddenly comes in and settles, and then lifts just as unexpectedly. Was life like this before? I don't remember. I was asking Husband if he remembered how things were before all of this. I

  • All things point to surrender (again)

    1 Nov 2009 | 10:57 am
    What I'm left with after reading and church this week is that I can find peace and freedom in surrender and gratitude.Notes to self (again):Step one: I'm powerless. Just admit it and surrender (over and over and over again!)One day at a time.My most important relationship is with my higher power, which I am an expression of. My most important actions are to use my life and my abilities to be of

  • No "fuck you"

    30 Oct 2009 | 12:16 am
    Because I have decided to try to work on my relationship with Husband, I've never had that final fuck-you moment. I've never been able to declare myself completely free of his influence and power over me. Instead I have said, "Yes, I gave you power over me - I gave you my trust. You betrayed that trust. And instead of withdrawing I'm choosing to trust you again. I'm giving you the power to hurt

  • So how do you cultivate self esteem?

    22 Oct 2009 | 8:20 pm
    On the Pat Morrison radio show yesterday, Rabbi Harold Kushner said "I would make a distinction between curing, making a problem go away, and healing, which is giving a person the emotional, spiritual resources to cope with a problem that isn't going away." I think this is an insightful way to describe the process I've been going through since I discovered Husband's sex addiction.There is no

  • I am my own white night

    7 Oct 2009 | 11:03 pm
    At my S-Anon meeting this week we talked about some of the surprising things we'd learned about ourselves in the recovery process.One of the big things I've learned is how much power I'd given over to Husband. I'm not a person who becomes intimate with many people, and at the time Husband and I met, I didn't trust people easily either. But in Husband I found someone I thought I could trust 100%
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    Blisstree » Diseases & Conditions

  • Remove Aspergers as a Diagnosis?

    Marijke Durning, RN
    3 Nov 2009 | 11:12 pm
    In 1944, an Austrian pediatrician, Hans Asperger, wrote about some characteristics he was seeing in some people, such as clumsiness, repetitive routines or rituals, different speech patterns (monotone, overly formal), inappropriate social behavior, and difficulties with non-verbal communication. Over the years, not much notice was taken until the 1980s when a doctor in the United Kingdom, Lorna Wing, noticed children with similar characteristics and she named what she saw as Aspergers syndrome. Since then,  the disorder was studied more, and in 1994, Asperger syndrome was labeled as an…

  • H1N1, Vaccines, and Mercury

    Marijke Durning, RN
    3 Nov 2009 | 12:05 am
    Yes, there is thimerosol in the H1N1 injectable vaccine. Yes, you are being encouraged to have the H1N1 vaccine to prevent the spread of influenza. Yes, there is a very tiny amount of mercury in thimerosol. NO, this does not cause autism. Several years ago, some doctors made a claim that the vaccines given to children caused autism. As some parents of children with autism wanted to be able to identify a specific cause for their children’s disability, they latched on to the theory that there was a connection between the vaccines and autism. The problem is, the very doctor who made this…

  • November 2: World Pneumonia Day

    Marijke Durning, RN
    2 Nov 2009 | 4:34 am
    Did you know that pneumonia is still a major cause of death among seniors? Did you know that pneumonia can strike down people of any age? Did you know that today is World Pneumonia Day? There is more than one type of pneumonia – it can be caused by viruses or bacteria, the most common causes, but also by other means. For example, someone who develops aspiration pneumonia got it by getting  vomit, food or drink into their lungs instead of their stomach. It’s not always obvious if you have pneumonia. You may just not be feeling well. But signs and symptoms of pneumonia include:…

  • COPD Awareness Month: November

    Marijke Durning, RN
    1 Nov 2009 | 11:14 pm
    Do you know what COPD stands for? Do you know what it is? COPD stands for chronic obstructive pulmonary disease. It’s a respiratory disease that could be virtually eliminated from the world if we would stop smoking altogether. Imagine that. Emphysema and chronic bronchitis fall under the COPD umbrella. According to the National Heart Lung and Blood Institute, COPD is now the 4th leading cause of death in the United States and also causes long-term disability. The number of people who have COPD is on the rise — more than 12 million are currently diagnosed with it. And it is estimated…

  • November Is Diabetes Month

    Marijke Durning, RN
    1 Nov 2009 | 1:12 am
    Not too long ago, many of us didn’t know anyone who had diabetes. Now, it’s almost impossible not to know someone who has it. Diabetes, particularly type 2 diabetes, has exploded and continues to do so in the western world. A disease once rarely seen in children, type 2 diabetes is now affecting them in large numbers, grossly affecting their health as adults. According to the American Diabetes Association: 24 million children and adults in the United States live with diabetes 57 million Americans are at risk for type 2 diabetes 1 out of every 3 children born today will face a…
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    In God's Hands

  • Just wondering

    indistinct
    26 Oct 2009 | 6:45 am
    In the journey of my life, I had attempted to stop drinking, to stop porning, many times. Earnest prayer, vows to God, promises to loved ones, applying will power, powerful resolve, really wanting to, they all failed. I relapsed, over and over again. The periods of sobriety might have been 2 hours, it might have been two months, but I would fall into the ditch of shame again. Until I went to treatment and was introduced to the 12 steps of Alcoholics Anonymous. For some reason, at this time, the obsession to drink and to porn was lifted. Taking those steps saved my life, walking those steps…

  • More, please

    indistinct
    24 Oct 2009 | 9:07 am
    It's time to report in, been a while.Early this week, I went on an emotional binge. Found a 40 pounder of self-pity and swallowed it all down. I needed to be understood. I needed to be needed. Was going to force my poor partner to understand just how trapped I was. How my life needed to change, I couldn't go on living in these conditions. I even started to think of ending my life, it wasn't worth the pain. Self-pity and anger, a deadly combination.Lost sight of my Higher Power's stage direction and decided I was going to play the victim.How is it that when I have something good in my life…

  • Who is next?

    indistinct
    23 Sep 2009 | 6:48 am
    I've been able to keep one class going after I had returned to work. An evening class about sociology. One of the topics that keeps rambling through my head is about the deserving and the undeserving. Who makes the choice about who has access to social services or financial support? I guess the concept is about how different schools of thought (conservative, liberal, or socialist are some of such schools) influence social welfare programs and who is allowed access to those programs.So I think about, (who else?), me. When I did step three, I turned my will and life over to the care of a power…

  • Not my way

    indistinct
    17 Sep 2009 | 6:41 am
    I remember this game which I played as a child, I believe it was called Labyrinth. It was a wooden board that could tilt in four directions. The object was to control the marble by tilting the board, running the marble through a maze and prevent the marble from falling down the traps (holes in the board.)I'm feeling like that marble today, my circumstances giving my life direction. I've had to withdraw from 4 classes and return to work. I'm still enrolled in one evening class (hurrah!) The choice to return was made by both my partner and I. I feel, well, deeply sad.The mood at work is darker…

  • Trusting

    indistinct
    15 Sep 2009 | 7:30 am
    There have been a few times in the past week where I've wanted to just pinch myself to reassure myself this isn't a dream. Sitting in class, participating in conversations I had never imagined I could have, staying right sized and hearing new ideas, and enjoying the enthusiasm of young adults, these experiences are so different than the heavy negativism I have experienced at work. Keeping up with homework and service work and even found time to play in the surf last Saturday. (The waves were scary big.) I never had believed that life could give so much when it was being lived.I was layed off…
 
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    addiction-recovery « WordPress.com Tag Feed

  • November 5th - A Beautiful Morning Run

    runningfromaddiction
    5 Nov 2009 | 11:04 am
    I really enjoy starting my day with a run.  This morning was beautiful.  My run, on the other hand, was not.   I felt much better than last time but I still only managed to put in about a mile (.74 to be exact).  I am not really happy with my current progress but I am happy to be running again.  It was fairly easy to get out and run this morning.  I think this is mostly due to the time change and things being much nicer in the morning.  I am starting another busy day at work so I better get to it.  I just wanted everyone to know I am starting to figure out my running routine!

  • wednesday

    Taylor
    4 Nov 2009 | 11:15 pm
    Lesson eleven: Today I learn that giving and receiving are one. You can give and receive compassion any moment you choose. Today has been really difficult. I actually already wrote a lengthy rant about my experience(s) today, but it’s a bit incomplete (and perhaps inappropriate here) so I won’t post it. Suffice it to say that I am depressed, frustrated, and feeling over committed. I feel like I am working non-stop just to be caught up with current events. Planning for the future and being prepared ahead of time seem like complete fantasies. Part of me feels that if I could just get…

  • November 4th - Busy Day

    runningfromaddiction
    4 Nov 2009 | 8:29 pm
    I had an amazingly busy day today.  I woke up much later than expected so running was out of question this morning.  Things had already piled up by the time I reached my office and I spent all day getting out from under the pile.  One great thing about my job is that even with my busy day, I had plenty of time to meet a new friend for lunch and left on time to meet up with my girls for homework time.  I love hanging out with my kids!  We have a plan for tomorrow morning.  They are going to give me a call tomorrow morning and I am going to run over and see them.

  • tuesday

    Taylor
    3 Nov 2009 | 11:37 pm
    Lesson ten: The power of choice is always available to me. This is something I have a hard time believing. My wife and I have this “discussion” quite often…and by “discussion” I mean argument. I have a hard time believing that I have much of a choice at all, I catch myself saying “I don’t really have a choice…” quite often. I often feel conflicted about what I should do and what I want to do. Almost always I succumb to the “have to” side, saying “I don’t really have a choice…” I have actually made some discoveries along these lines recently. I don’t…

  • November 3rd - Las Vegas Reality Check

    runningfromaddiction
    3 Nov 2009 | 2:38 pm
    I just looked at my blog homepage and was reminded there is only about a month left before I am to run the Las Vegas Marathon.  To my readers from the running community it is probably obvious but I have come to the realization that I will not be running the Las Vegas Marathon. There is just no way on earth I can go from struggling through a 1.4 mile run to running 26.2 miles.  I will however be attending and completing the entire 26.2 mile race on December 6th.  My current plan is to train as much as possible in the remaining time and run/walk the marathon.  I am setting out with the goal…
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    Sobriety is Exhausting

  • Quick Tuesday Night Post

    Pam
    27 Oct 2009 | 4:02 pm
    Hey, I'm at home packing a bag to go stay at Mothers for a few days.....just want to be with her now and Ms. SoberPants is exhausted.No TV there or computer. This is a house of art projects, guitar playing and conversation.I will post when I get back home......smoochie love - PamPS: God is every where, isn't that awesome?

  • Just Having Some Ouch These Days

    Pam
    27 Oct 2009 | 3:22 am
    Not since infancy have I awakened every morning with thoughts of my Mother. She is on my mind constantly now and I am starting to resent that I don't have a trust fund set up somewhere that would allow me to leave my job and stay with her.I have moments through out the day when I'm consumed with fear of the approaching life without her. Lots of people around me love her but I just want to scream "she's not your MAMA and you don't know how I feel!"OK, got all that out. Over the weekend Mama told us (me and my daughters) to get "THE black dress" out of the back closet. She has kept this dress…

  • Monday Morning

    Pam
    26 Oct 2009 | 2:40 am
    I don't know why it is Monday again, yet it is.The weekend held many emotional moments as my Mothers small house held me, my two daughters and Mother herself. No house on earth is equipped for four women.I only made one meeting over the weekend but it was one more than I thought I would get.My spirit feels kind of low but comfortable. It's odd how sobriety and living a life of simple principles can do that. I can be comfortable when everything isn't happy or safe. I can be at peace even when nothing around me is predictable. This is the fruit of seeking God and staying sober.It's funny how a…

  • Gratitude After All

    Pam
    25 Oct 2009 | 7:39 am
    I'm just waking up and it is almost 10:00. I got home from Mothers at midnight and then stayed up for awhile. I need to hit the shower but I wanted to look over a few blogs this morning.I don't have a 10 Best Moments post. I have pondered this for a few days but I can not for the life of me come up with 10 best moments. I don't remember "moments" I just don't. I thought of the typical "birth of my children" moments but quite frankly I was having an awful time in each of those marriages and they weren't really great moments. The years with each of the kids afterwards brought on lots of…

  • Saturday Morning

    Pam
    24 Oct 2009 | 5:58 am
    A small fragile confused woman has taken over my Mothers body. I feel I have to guard her now but I'm not sure from who. The suffering has appeared now like the scary shadow in the corner when you turn the lights off. I never knew how inter-twined our spirits were until hers started this slow ripping away from mine.I am mostly at work or her house now and I am coming home to sleep. I am reading every ones blogs from my desk at work in the mornings but it's hard to comment from there. I don't know how y'all are carrying on with life minus my unsolicited advice ;)God is so "present" in every…
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    Actively Arielle: A Voice With A Commitment

  • Question # 12: Turning Away from Self-Hate AND Behaviors

    Arielle Bair (Becker)
    5 Nov 2009 | 3:02 pm
    Question # 12 comes from Stella. It’s one of two questions she posed, but the second one will come later, as this post is quite lengthy. She asks, “How do you react when you feel hate for yourself and your body? What do you do when you feel overwhelmed, instead of hurting yourself or restricting?” As a woman who loves her body now (or at least likes it most of the time!), trust me when I

  • Respecting Our Bodies In Reference to Clothing Sizes

    Arielle Bair (Becker)
    2 Nov 2009 | 6:03 pm
    This is last Wednesday's video for the ED recovery collaboration. The topic was: respecting our bodies and dealing with clothing sizes. Click to view on YouTube as embedding is still not an option. :) And please, guys, send in your art to my Giveaway! I have already received by email 3 beautiful pieces and can't wait to see more!

  • Calling All Art! I’m Having a Giveaway!

    Arielle Bair (Becker)
    29 Oct 2009 | 3:21 pm
    Are you an artist? Do you doodle to get your feelings onto paper? Maybe you draw in the margins of your notebook in class. Maybe you paint murals. Maybe you’re just trying to find an outlet for your emotions. Whatever the case, if you’d like your artwork displayed on my blog, here’s what you can do:If you’ve created some form of art, whether it be a sketch, a painting, a sculpture, etc. and you

  • Thank You!

    Arielle Bair (Becker)
    26 Oct 2009 | 5:01 am
    I just want to take a minute to thank you all for voting for my blog. My blog is currently #10 in the Top 20 HealthBloggers on Wellsphere, so it's definitely making a difference. You are all wonderful and I really appreciate it. Voting goes through Dec. 15th, so I'm hoping I stay near the top or even move on up!I have amazing readers.You can only vote once, but if you'd still like to vote and

  • Question # 11: Recovery Tools

    Arielle Bair (Becker)
    23 Oct 2009 | 2:37 pm
    Question # 11 is from "Julia"--she writes: “I'm unable (with good reason) to tell my parents about what I am now willing to admit is my eating disorder.Because of this, I'm having to recover not only outside the inpatient facility I truthfully need, but also under the radar.What tools did you use in your recovery that you think could help in my situation?”I won’t argue with you about what you say
 
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    Ex Con Alcoholic Addict's Struggle

  • This sure made me angry

    25 Oct 2009 | 11:41 am
    I guess a private prison company has been paying off juvenile judges in exchange for more bodies to occupy their facilities. It's being called The "Kids for Cash" scandal. Read more Here.It's time for the wayback but not toofarback machine.While talking with my friend who I mentioned in the last post, he mentioned what his last stay at San Quentin had been like. He spent three months in reception where he was locked up 24 hours a day. Meals were served on the tiers inside the cells because their was no movement on the grounds on account of quarantine for swine flu. Showers were given every…

  • Phenomena

    15 Oct 2009 | 4:25 pm
    I ran into a friend who was released from prison the same time as myself. We were in the same program upon release and even at the parolee house. He was still trying to see how far he could push things and stayed in constant trouble with the counselors at the program and his parole officer. Although he stopped using drugs completely. He missed the "exciting life" that comes along with the life of an addict. And, he's been violated and returned to prison many times since our simultaneous release.After the constant defiance and rebellion against being told what to do he will be discharging…

  • Gettin Goin

    5 Oct 2009 | 10:07 am
    I have been sorta busy lately. I have not been going to meetings as much as I would like to. I only went to 4 in the last month. I haven't got a sponsor yet. I don't feel good about this.It's not like I am being attacked by my cravings. Actually, I am blessed that feelings of using rarely enter my head. I just feel like I am at a standstill as far as my growth is concerned. So, today I am going to a meeting and I am going to go to 5 meetings this week and maybe find a sponsor. I am not a dry drunk or white knuckling it. On the contrary, feelings of joy and gratitude wash over me at the…

  • Checkin In

    23 Sep 2009 | 10:20 am
    I've been busy with work and entertaining my girlfriend who wisely decided to spend her vacation with me the whole week. We are having fun and hopefully I won't be so tired when I have a day off on Fri.I'll post a big one on tuesday. Lots to talk about.Until thenPictured Me and Not my girlfriend.The Greatest Readers

  • Reassurance

    16 Sep 2009 | 4:23 pm
    While leaving for the airport for my trip back home to San Francisco, my mother remarked, "Frankie, let's make it quick, Ok? She was referring to our usual excruciating goodbyes we endure whenever she or I leave each other when returning home from a visit to one another. I replied, "Want to say bye right now" hoping to escape the embarrassment of entering the terminal like I was just tear gassed at a anarchy rally.With that my mom turned around and faced the front door of the house and pretended to be waiting for my stepdad, Jimmy, to exit the house. I knew she was starting. I turned to my…
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    sexual-sanity.com

  • Self pity: friend or enemy of recovery?

    Mark
    4 Nov 2009 | 8:36 pm
    We all have tendencies to self pity. We will never be perfectly free from it. In fact, in some ways, self-pity is normal and may even be helpful as part of the process of grieving our losses, and coming to terms with unresolved childhood wounds. Pete Walker, in “Recovering: The Adventure of Life Beyond Addiction,” has this to say about self-pity: “Everyone needs to occasionally feel sorry for themselves. Tears for the self are some of the most potently healing experiences of recovery. Self-pity, in balance and moderation, is extremely healing. Recovery, in fact, is often…

  • Sexual anorexia revisited

    Mark
    30 Sep 2009 | 2:32 am
    Today’s post is an update of an article I wrote several years ago. I’m republishing it here because it’s a really important topic, and isn’t getting the attention it deserves. At issue is sexual anorexia, the unhealthy fixation on avoiding sex out of fear and shame. It can appear on the surface like a commitment to sexual purity (just as food anorexia can appear on the surface to be healthy self-discipline around eating). But under the surface sexual anorexia is very different than it appears. It’s not about healthy self-control, it’s about fear,…

  • Being honest doesn’t mean saying everything you think

    Mark
    21 Sep 2009 | 8:56 am
    People in recovery struggle to establish honesty in their relationships. One of the consequences of addiction is lack of trust, stemming from the history of half truths and outright lies that were employed to cover up the addictive behavior. This is especially the case with sex addiction, because when violations of marital vows are involved, there is even more pressure for secrecy. The obvious antidote to the all this lying would seem to be simple: just tell the truth. But how do we do that in a loving way. Does “ruthless honesty” mean telling the “whole truth” all the…

  • New study shows abuse rates by Catholic priests even higher than expected

    Mark
    18 Sep 2009 | 2:20 pm
    There’s a great article on our companion blog for pastors (lastingleaders.org) about a recent report with even more bad news for Catholics. A comprehensive study done for the U.S. Conference of Catholic Bishops found that between 1950 and 2002, 4 percent of Catholic priests were accused of sexually abusing minors (4,450 of the 110,000 priests active during that period). Previous estimates by church officials had been much lower. Read the article for more. Tweet This Post 

  • Facing our love / hate experience with God

    Mark
    27 Aug 2009 | 8:54 am
    I am increasingly convinced that spiritual inauthenticity is a major roadblock for many Christians in recovery. When we try to convince ourselves to believe something we don’t really believe, or when we struggle with thoughts and feelings about God that “we shouldn’t have,” we get stuck. There are no easy answers here, but I believe it is essential to face our questions, doubts, and jumble of feelings about God in an honest way if our recovery is going to be sustainable. To that end, I want to share an article written by Sallie Culbreth, Founder of Committed to…
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    Laughter Is The Best Medicine

  • Top 10 rules for parents

    Deborah Maue
    30 Oct 2009 | 9:00 am
    So since I found out that the Baby Einstein thing was all a big scam, I’ve been thinking about what I would tell new parents (if asked, that is.  I try really hard – not always successfully – not to give unsolicited advice.) So here are my “rules” for parenting, for if anyone is interested: 1. Relax. Take a deep breath. 2. Hug your kids a lot and tell them you love them at least once a day. Preferably more. 3. Act delighted to see them when you greet them, and ask them how their day was. (And try to pay attention to the answer for 5 minutes. Which I manage to do…

  • I want my money back

    Deborah Maue
    28 Oct 2009 | 8:50 am
    Oh, crap. All those Baby Einstein videos I bought aren’t going to guarantee David’s admission to Harvard? Oops – guess I’ve been duped. (David who rarely wears a shirt unless he’s leaving the house) I think Emma was about five when I realized that there’s a reason why most kids don’t get into Harvard, and it’s not that they didn’t watch enough PBS, or they watched too much Barney (thank God those days are over), or they weren’t read to for 20 full minutes a day, or they didn’t play enough Candyland (blech. I hate Candyland.) In…

  • More excuses why I haven’t been blogging

    Deborah Maue
    26 Oct 2009 | 11:54 am
    1. Margaret untethered the hot air balloon in the garage and it took me 12 hours to find her. 2. Had to get ready to host bunco. 3. Spending hours and hours making home-made Halloween costumes. No one will believe that one. 4. Catching up on episodes of Glee. (Good show) 5. Catching up on episodes of Modern Family.  (Great show) 6. Catching up on episodes of Dexter, Season 2. (Great show) 7. Trying to practice my art skills so I can stay ahead of David. Futile. He’s already surpassed me. (Not saying much. I can’t even draw a cat that’s recognizable as a cat.) 8. Can’t…

  • Breaded Cod with Spinach

    Deborah Maue
    13 Oct 2009 | 5:41 pm
    I adapted this recipe from one I saw in Woman’s Day a few years ago. It’s delicious.  I serve it with a side of boiled red potatoes or boiled noodles with a bit of parmesan and olive oil. Ingredients: 4 cod fillets 1 cup panko bread crumbs, Italian-flavored 2 Tbsp. olive oil 2 Tbsp. freshly grated Parmesan cheese 1 lb. spinach 2 garlic cloves, peeled and minced 1 Tbsp. olive oil 2 Tbsp. pine nuts, toasted Toss  spinach, olive oil, garlic and pine nuts in a large rectangular glass baking dish. Combine bread crumbs, 2 Tbsp. olive oil and grated parmesan in a bowl.  Roll cod…

  • Dear David, I’m sorry

    Deborah Maue
    10 Oct 2009 | 5:39 am
    Dear David, Please accept my sincere apologies for the fact that I did not collect your tooth and leave money last night.  I can only imagine your heart-rending sobs this morning when you looked under you pillow and discovered that your tooth was still there.  There’s so little in life you can really count on, and you’d think that getting money for teeth would be one of them, I know. What can I say? I had every intention of making my usual rounds last night.  I had my wings polished and my fairy dust replenished in the morning, same as usual.  I was ready to go.  But then the…
 
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    The Word From The Hood

  • Wordless Wednesday-Jesus Pumpkin

    28 Oct 2009 | 12:05 am

  • Ghosts & Hauntisngs: A Christian View

    27 Oct 2009 | 12:05 am
    ShazooloThe philosophy of this Christian site is to endeavor to examine other beliefs, world-views and philosophies, in a respectful way. All individuals of differing beliefs disagree. To deny this is like denying the sun will rise tomorrow. It is only when we forget that we are all human, and brothers and sisters in Adam, that debate and disagreements become mean spirited and personal. Disagreement and mutual respect as individuals can go hand in hand. None of this means that truth needs to be compromised.Pt. 1 - Ghosts & Hauntings: A Christian ViewPt. 2 - Ghosts & Hauntings: A…

  • Wordless Wednesday-Stop Leaning On My Face

    21 Oct 2009 | 12:05 am

  • The Parties Over

    16 Oct 2009 | 10:46 am
    The Latinos: Anyone who is still partying and having a good time, like there is no tomorrow...will probably not see tomorrow..if you continue with your ways.

  • Testimony Thursday: Conquering Life's Mountains

    15 Oct 2009 | 12:05 am
    (The Tina Barry Story) The young social worker opened the door of the abandoned building and could not believe what she saw. Trash was all over the floor, including rotten chicken bones and other rotten foods, and in the midst of this disgusting mess were four little girls. These girls were sleeping on old mattresses that were thrown on the floor and a baby bed with a mattress that was oozing its stuffing’s and covered in baby excrement.These four little girls ranged in age nine months to six years old. The social worker noticed the youngest was naked, covered in scum and near death from…
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